This will be one of those really personal posts. For some days ago, on 24th May to be exact, I traveled with my best friend Sacchan to the hospital, for surgery. We had to drive for several hours because the hospital was in a different county in Sweden. Before anyone gets worried I just want to make one thing clear – this was a planned surgery and thus nothing sudden and life-threatening.
Because we started driving early on the morning we arrived at our destination city with some hours to spare and yeah, because we both were hungry we quickly decided on going to eat something before I had my visit. Our first choice was of course going to a sushi bar because we knew a good and cheap one from earlier visits and hey, there's no sushi places where we live so it's luxury to eat sushi for us, lol.
When we were done eating and in the car, driving towards the hospital, it suddenly hit us that Sacchan's cellphone was nowhere to be found. The panic struck us and we had to go back to the sushi bar to double-check that she did not accidentally forget it there. The cellphone was not there and we were seriously panicking... until I noticed that it had somehow fallen and gone under the car seat that I was sitting on. We managed to get it out of there and sighed with relief – until we noticed that we only had 30 minutes left before I had to be in the hospital talking with my surgeon, d'oh!
To make matters worse we got lost and ended up circling everywhere and panicking even more. I don't know but even though we had planned plenty of time we still had to run and stress like hell. Somehow we managed to get to the hospital on time and I wasn't even late. Or well... I was, 5 minutes, but that's because as soon as I had checked in my stomach groaned and I had to run to the bathroom because of urgent poop needs.
The talk went well, although it was very short. I also had to go talk to the anesthesiologist and bring some papers with me. He talked so fucking fast I had a hard time following anything he said – and here I've always been told that I talk fast, what the heck. I felt a bit bothered that he asked me questions that I had written down the exact answers for already at home... I mean, why ask me the questions when the answers were written down right in front of you? It felt like I had sat with mom and filled in all those health questions for hours and for nothing. At least I heard afterwards that he had indeed checked the papers and that he's actually a really careful guy – just didn't give me that impression, lol.
After meeting the anesthesiologist I also had to go take a blood test and then I was free for the day. Me and Sacchan had booked a room for the night in the patient/hospital hotel on the other side of the road and it was, to be honest, pretty damn comfy. The only thing that wasn't cool was that after a set time I was not allowed to eat anything and that totally means that I got no hotel breakfast, even though it would have been free. :'( But yeah, the anesthesiologist gave me really detailed information why one should never eat before surgery and yeah, I think I sorta wish I never knew such details...
The whole day had been really cloudy, dull and gray and it had been raining too. But when late evening rolled in I spotted a huge rainbow behind the hospital. It was a magical sight and it touched me deeply, somehow, because it felt so symbolic in a way and, even more so, because it was actually a double rainbow – except that the second rainbow (the outer one) was so pale you could barely see anything, save for the very beginning of it. My crummy cellphone couldn't catch the second rainbow but I got photo proof anyway. It was a really beautiful sight and, although the colors look dull on the photo, the sky was a vivid pinkish violet in real life.
Morning came. I felt a weird mix of being super nervous and calm at the same time. I don't even know how I managed to stay as collected as I was –now that I think about it afterwards– but oh well. Sacchan went to eat hotel breakfast and I went to shower. I was hungry but not as hungry as I thought I would be; normally I'm that kind of person who doesn't function properly if I skip breakfast. If I remember right I had to be in the hospital around 8 and we left our hotel room keys with some time to spare.
When we got to the hospital ward we were supposed to be in a kind nurse showed us to my room – that's when it really hit me that today I'm gonna have my first ever surgery. I could feel the butterflies in my stomach multiplying and I started to feel tense and scared; it felt like every minute was longer than it should. Turned out the surgeon was approximately 15 minutes late but when he finally showed up I suddenly didn't feel all kinds of stressed anymore. He was calm and I guess his calmness sort of stuck to me as well? We talked for a short while about the procedure and what will happen when I'm asleep and then he left; he said that I was the second patient for the day so my time to go under the knife would be around lunch time. Yikes!
I had a couple hours for mercy and spent that time examining my room and talking with Sacchan – it was honestly really appreciated that she followed with (and drove me there) because I'd probably have gone crazy if I was alone. I really easily start to feel bad at hospitals and then I freak out, overthink everything and yeah... I'm not good with this stuff.
|My hospital bed during the stay.|
I was surprised when they stopped right in front of the surgery room and told me to stand up and walk inside. I had expected that I would need to shower with some special soap or at least change to some temporary single-use underwear (that's what mom told me) but I didn't have to do either. :S Some male doctors showed up in the room and told me to lie down on the super narrow surgery table. They proceeded to put on some circular adhesive pads (for heart check stuff) on my collar bone area and on the lower rib cage. I had to place both my arms on some funky armrests that extended from the surgery table in a chunky C shape. Felt weird.
One of the guys made me breathe into a tiny triangle-shaped oxygen mask and then I got told that the anesthetic might sting my arm a little when it enters my body because of a different pH value; they also told me that it was the color of milk but I honestly didn't have time to see the color nor feel anything before I fell asleep. It was painless and didn't actually even feel forced or unnatural, contrary to what I thought. I remember having a pleasant sleep (although no actual dream as far as I can recall) and when I woke up in the awakening ward my first reaction in my head was "where am I?". It felt like I had not slept more than maybe 10 minutes but it had actually been hours. It felt so weird and unreal to realize that someone had been cutting your body and you hadn't felt shit.
I heard from the nurses it only took me 5 minutes to open my eyes once I had been taken to the wake-up room but I kept dozing off for hours afterwards. It was really weird because one second I could feel super alert and fresh and the next second I could barely keep my eyes open; I kept alternating in this weird world of shifting from one extreme to the other in a matter of seconds and it was just... weird. My memories from the wake-up room are kinda foggy but I remember that the older lady next to me snored so loudly that I'm sure even Jesus heard her, lol. She dozed off a lot more than I did as well.
It was early night, I believe, before I was taken back to my own hospital room. Sacchan sat there waiting and it was so relieving to see a familiar face again! I heard from her she had gotten a panic attack while I was gone and I honestly felt bad about it but yeah, luckily she had managed to gather herself. I can't really blame her because had I been in her place I'd probably freak out too if someone dear to me was to have surgery and you'd just sit between four walls and wait hours on end...
|This poster was on my door. It spoke to me.|
I got to meet the surgeon again and he informed me about what to avoid while healing etc and told me that I'll get called to meet him again in a few weeks too.
Some other funny and not so funny things happened during the hospital stay too but yeah, this post is getting way too long so I'll just cut it short now. I must mention though that one of the funny things is as much hilarious as it is eww-worthy. xD Because of an unfortunate situation Sacchan had to go move the car from a parking lot to another and on the way she saw two youngish men standing on the hotel's balcony (it's on the backside, away from the road). They were obviously drunk and one of them, literally, puked from the balcony! Please note that they were on one of the top floors and it was really windy – to the point the flow of vomit didn't fall in a straight line. Now take a minute of your life to imagine that. *silence* EEWWWWW. *silence* And, to make matters worse, this same guy soon after started taking off his pants, while still standing on the balcony... but that's when Sacchan left (she was inside the car, most likely neither of the guys noticed her presence) because she wasn't sure she wanted to watch the rest of the show, lol. So yeah... yeaaaaaah.
Right now I'm recovering at my mom's. My movement is limited and so I need help to do even some very basic daily tasks. I hope my recovery will be smooth.
I'm sorry about the crummy quality of all the photos but they're all taken with my cellphone; I "forgot" my camera at home and I thought that some shitty photos are still better than no photos at all. Then again, at first I wasn't even sure if I'd write about this but oh well, here goes nothing.
~ Shiro Samurai out.